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Friday, 17 September 2010

[ ..peanuts.. ]

Sometimes I wonder if life worth living.

You walk and walk and walk. You continue to walk in hoping that the things you are finding will be found.

It's kinda like a treasure hunt, but there are more than one treasure! But the catch is that, once you found a treasure, you have to continue move on to another treasure hunting and search all over the maze again to get it.

Life is like, you put a mouse in a maze, put a piece of cheese at a place he doesn't know. And you tells him to find for it. He runs all around the maze, searching high and low, then when he found it, he happily tells you about it, but you put another bigger piece of cheese at another place for him to find. He will now needs to slowly eat the cheese he found, so that he can regain his energy and stamina to continue finding the bigger piece of cheese.

Then when by the time he finish the cheese he had, he found the bigger piece of cheese. He once again happily tells you about it, but you once again crush his happiness by telling him that you had just put another piece of cheese in another section of the maze, which is bigger than the second one he found, and he needs to find that bigger than bigger piece of cheese, while eating the cheese he found bits by bits so that he can have the energy to find it. And this continues and continues and continues until the mouse died of old age. Or maybe too much calcium and lack of water.

Sometimes, I feel like that mouse. Like, I got thrown in that maze without my consent and told to do things that everyone else is doing. The only way I can stay alive is to continue eating that piece of cheese I found each time. The cheese is tempting. I cannot live without the piece of cheese. But sometimes I think, if life is without the cheese, it would be much better. I have lack one thing to worry about.

It tiring, ya' know? Walking round and round in the maze looking for the piece of cheese just because everyone else is doing it. Sometimes I feel like, there is no meaning to the existence of life anymore.

How I wish the world can be a little different. But sometimes i also wish I can be a little different from I am now. It's stressful, tiring and mostly, I feel stuck.

I said this one too many times... I feel stuck stuck stuck. Like the mouse. Just stuck at the maze and can't never get out of it. Stuck at searching for cheese and can't even stop to have a drink.

Stuck.

I look at my childhood photos. 99% of them I am smiling like this.

Meh~ Look at me in cloth diaper.

If you see me smiling like this right now, it's probably a fake one. Or you are really that funny. ;D

Sometimes I just wonder... if life really worth living?

Sometimes I wonder... when will I be able to smile like this anymore?

I hope so...

G'night all...

suwa.

:: stitched on` ::*|02:38|

:: [0] care[s] ::

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:: ..it is me.. ::
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suwas.jpg
Ailurophile. Irascible. Desultory. Furtive.

Me

:: ..Type Here.. ::
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:: ..pages i stalk.. ::
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..queen of mushrooms..
..best page on earth..


:: ..Tick Tock.. :: --------------------------------------

:: ..Calender 2013.. ::

June
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::..Wishes.. ::
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~ eternal financial stability, bitch
~ Tokyo solo 2013
~ to Japan, I go for second time!
~ to Japan, I go!
~ Canon G12
~ Superheadz Ultra Wide and Slim!
~ Superheadz Golden Half!
~ new camera!
~ a studio home
~ publish a novel/short stories compilation


:: ..Crédits.. ::
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